Latin guys can learn some high level BS from African guys it seems, LOL.

You crack me up, Matthew! Haven't laughed this hard in a long time.

The whole reason why I started being more diligent is because I had some horrible experiences with a couple of Latin American guys who unfortunately grow up to be pure narcissists, incapable to be vulnerable or honest because of that.

But hey, they just didn't let me get to their tech. In fact, the first thing they would say to me was "Don't touch my phone!" Oh dear lord...

But what your guys do.... That's some next level BS there, I haven't even thought of that.

It practically makes my idea nill and void, if the reality tells us that there are some serious psychopaths out there, because sorry, this is not just narcissistic, this is some serious psychopath level of deception.

But the only ones who are being deprived here is the very people who are trying to hide their lives (be it a private person or a politician) because at the end of the day, they never give themselves the opportunity that someone truly gets to know them.

So basically... Such people achieve the very thing they complain about - not being truly loved - because they make SURE that no one could EVER get close to them and hence not able to know them nor love them.

I've read about African women (those who care about having a life) how they choose NOT to have any relationship with a man whatsoever, so no marriage, no kids, nothing, just so they have the freedom to work and be themselves.

What shocked me is that they have entirely given up on the idea of ever having a meaningful relationship with a man. Which again, is so sad but hey, I get it! I almost ended up in that same scenario.

My question at this point is then - where does this need for secrecy start, who teaches you guys to do that, what is the belief in the society how a man needs to be?

So far I haven't seen even one expert saying that once someone becomes a narcissist, this can be reversed. The walls are so high up, or perhaps there is simply something missing (the innate ability to believe that you are actually a worthy individual?) which can not be replaced any longer? I don't know but my heart breaks at the thought that so many people are lost to the BS we've created for ourselves. Yes, I could have just said as a woman that men are assholes, but my entire book is trying to counter that very premise and prove how valuable men are and how we need to appreciate them much MUCH more.

But is it too late for this generation and the previous ones? Imagine how many people live in the belief that they have to be perfect, that they can't trust anyone, hence they have to control it all and even fake your own tech in order to keep up appearances.

That is one lonely existence in the end.

And let's face it, WE all have created these variations of humans. An asshole isn't born an asshole. We make them.

Ah well, I'll keep digging and if you have any insights, Matthew, they will be very welcome!

Really appreciate you replying to me in the first place and liking my ideas (as naive as they might perhaps be, LOL).