"Every single one of us has a voice in our head that wants us to stop trying. It wants to give up."

I think you are absolutely right about that one.

You're also right in saying, it never truly goes away.

At the moment what I am facing when dealing with certain teenagers is their moaning about "Aaaah, but that's EFFORT!"

Well, yeah, duh! Everything is effort.

I used to compare the whole thing with simple physics - it's the nature of the world that a stone prefers to roll down. Downhill is easy, downhill is the only way for many things. Everything seems to want to go down, down, down.

Life itself is that almost magical force which counters gravity, makes plants grow up to the sky, makes us stand tall, makes us build skyscrapers.

Is that why we love building skyscrapers? Because it defies the inevitable decay, at least as a symbol? Didn't mean to go that philosophical.

But given that it's in everyone's nature to be lazy because it SEEMS easier at the time to do nothing, what kids need to learn and what we all need to learn is to get used to freaking effort.

That's why I think every kid should do sports. I don't mind computer games, I like them as well, but sports teaches you that there is enjoyment in effort. I used to love to feel my burning muscles, get myself to the brink of my capabilities.

I think that experience is what helped me later in life when I got into scrapes similar to yours and which lasted far longer. It was the endurance that I was used to, which kept me going.

I'm really glad, you asked for help and got another chance. But having lived in fear for so long really does a number on you and that sucks.

I hope you feel safe again and you can enjoy life.

Gosh, I'm so glad my teenage years and my twenties' are behind me, I would not like to go through that again, not even if you paid me a billion dollars, LOL.